Adventures in Fatherhood: Noticing the other

Two wide awake boys
Two wide awake boys | Photo by Jonathan Blundell

It’s so interesting to see how the two boys respond to one another.

At a few days more than two weeks old, it’s hard to definitively tell whether or not they realize there’s another brother/baby in the room.

Sometimes they’ll sleep right through the other one’s crying.

Sometimes they’ll sound as if they’re talking to one another with grunts and moans.

The other day we placed them both in the Pack-N-Play and Hayden was laying with his arms up, and his hands tucked under his head… totally chill-axin’.

We laid Ian down and for the first time he rolled towards Hayden. He rested his cheek against Hayden’s arm and everything was right with the world. Of course eventually Hayden realized someone was crampin’ his style a bit and pulled his arm back. But for a brief moment, they were united.

Saturday night as I fed Hayden, Ian had trouble getting to sleep. He apparently wanted more to eat himself and kept acting fussing and dropping his pacifier, etc.

I finally gave in and gave him a little of the milk left in Hayden’s bottle and then picked them both up and held them in my lap together.

It was as if all was right with the world for both of them.

They leaned towards each other and quickly drifted off to sleep. A few minutes later — almost on cue — they both simultaneously dropped their pacifiers out of their mouths.

I’ve heard a number of remarkable stories about the bond between twins since we first found out about the boys. There’s a unique kinship there that some say goes beyond even their marriage relationships. A deep bond between another that others can only imagine.

It makes me wonder a few things…

Do we notice “the other” when they walk in the room?

Do we notice “the other” when we pass them on the street?

Do we take the time to notice “the other” when they need a shoulder to cry on?

Do we take the time to share the special bonds that we have as human beings?

Or are we too concerned with someone else “crowding our space” and flat out ignore the joy and comfort that we might be able to share with someone else?

Imagine how different our communities might be if we all took the time to notice “the others” all around us…

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Jonathan Blundell

I'm a husband, father of three, blogger, podcaster, author and media geek who is hoping to live a simple life and follow The Way.

2 thoughts on “Adventures in Fatherhood: Noticing the other”

  1. You have two cute little boys, but then is there such a thing as an ugly baby?? Oh wait……..I was a baby once. But I digress….

    Seems to me that, as a society, we tend to go/look the other way when we hear the ‘cry’ of others.

    1-We don’t want to get involved.
    2-There are others more capable than myself.
    3-I don’t have the time
    4-(Name your excuse.)

    Yet, we are not meant to be alone. Even Adam with his great job and Boss needed someone. God said it wasn’t good for Adam to be alone. Relationships are important, even if they can be messy. (Don’t pass all of Hayden and Ian’s ‘messy’ relational stuff onto their Mother. ha ha)

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